Love letter to my baby Kate…

I sat on the couch nursing you tonight thinking about how perfect this moment was.  Your sister and dad are in bed reading and you and I get to spend this precious time together.  I look at your face.  Your eyes are closed yet you still suck getting nourishment from me, your mama.  Your long lashes flutter and I think “thank goodness you got your lashes from your daddy”.

After you’ve had your fill, you open your eyes and look at me.  Your lips spread into a smile as you recognize me.  Next you start stretching your arms and legs.  Asking me to let you “stand”.  You smile again.  Those gummy smiles melt my heart.  I look at your chubby legs and the creases in your neck.  I breathe in your milk smell and your sweet milk breath.  You look at your hands in wonderment and grab at your feet.  I smile thinking how you must be surprised at the presence of these appendages.  My breast milk has nourished you for the last 9 months.  My body has housed and nurtured you for the past 14 months and that’s absolutely amazing.  Our bond is so strong.  Not even the bond I have with your daddy is this strong.  Calming you and feeding you is my job and it’s the best in the world.

I love you so much.  Your my last baby.  Every moment from now on, I’ll be in awe of how your are changing and growing.  Every moment, you learn something new.  One day you will become a woman but for now, you are my baby and I am your mother.  One day I will write out your birth story so you will know how much you were and are wanted.  But for now, I will luxuriate in your baby presence.  Because tomorrow you will be another baby.

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